When you’re going through a divorce, you’re going to have your own emotional challenges. These may be intense, and they’ll come at the same time that you have to help your children deal with similar feelings. It can be overwhelming to do this if you don’t have a plan.
One thing that most children want during the divorce is to know that both parents are going to remain involved with them. They don’t want to feel like they are going to lose either parent so they may have a lot of stress about how splitting time between two homes will impact them.
Showing your children patience as they work through the feelings that arise is important. They need to feel like they have a good support system while they are adjusting to the changes that come with the divorce. They need to know that they are still important to you.
Sometimes, children will blame themselves for the split. You must reassure them that this was due to differences between the adults and that it didn’t have anything to do with their actions. No child should be left to think that they were the reason their parents ended the marriage.
Another concern of many kids is that their parents are going to be constantly fighting now. Seeing the two most important adults in their life battling can drive them into an emotional tailspin. Be sure you and your ex set some ground rules for respectful communication with each other, even if this means you have to be business-like.
The parenting plan that you establish is the guide you’ll use for all things related to the children. Be sure that you fully understand it so that you don’t breach it in any manner.