Being in an abusive marriage is dangerous. You never know when things will turn violent. Any form of violence is a threat to your safety. If you realize that you need to get out of the marriage, you need to plan to leave.
One of the most important things to remember is that you can’t plan to leave if you aren’t safe. Being able to set up a plan and prepare for leaving is only possible if you aren’t in danger. Be sure to honestly evaluate the situation. Always be prepared to leave if something happens, and you’re suddenly in danger.
Save some money
You’re going to need money to make ends meet when you first leave the abusive relationship. This should be easily accessible by you but not by your ex. Think carefully about how much you’re going to need since this must be worked into your plans.
At a minimum, you need to have your driver’s license, birth certificate and Social Security card when you leave. You may also need other documents, such as a copy of the mortgage, bank account statements and retirement account statements. If you can’t take the originals, get copies of them, so you have them when you need them.
Find a place to go
You’ll need somewhere safe to go when you leave. This can be a shelter or a loved one’s house. The key here is that you need somewhere that you know you aren’t going to have to worry about your ex coming after you and harming you.
Once you leave the abusive marriage, you’ll have to go through the divorce process to legally end the marriage. It will behoove you to discuss the situation with an attorney who’s familiar with this type of situation, so they can let you know your options and discuss these with you.